Tuesday, February 14, 2012

I run...but does that make me a runner?

Strange. I have no problem telling people that "I run" but I still have issues with saying "I'm a runner" as it identifies me with a group I'm not quite sure I "fit" with yet.

Even now (as I think I should have learned by now that my vision is NOT true), I envision "runners" as these svelty people who glide across pavement. I'm certainly not svelte. I certainly don't glide. Now, while I've been told that my gait is good for runners, I see myself in every marathonfoto pic and it looks like I'm simply walking. No svelte gliding present there!

See....I still don't think I "fit" in. I suppose I look at every group run I am involved with, and while I'm not a whale, I am typically the most pudgy of the group. Maybe this "fitting in" is getting worse as a result of our new restaurant eating habits....but I suppose its been there all along, but just feels stronger now. Maybe I feel that since I finished a half marathon, this thought should have dissipated? I really did think that after i finished it, I could say "I'm a runner". And, while I have that oval "runnergirl" sticker on the back on my SUV, I'm still not sure I identify with it. I try. I really do try. But, getting over your own vision of yourself is hard.

Its easy to lose weight, relatively speaking...but very hard to see yourself differently, even with running attire on that makes you look the part. Until you know you feel the part, you are spending so much energy to convince yourself...now, eventually, my mind will give in and accept it. But that hasn't quite happened yet.

Seems so contradictory since I know I've come so far, doesn't it? I'm lightyears ahead of most people out there, and I am so far removed to the non-physical person I was. I know I've earned the title of "runner" and yet my mind doesn't agree.

I'll just have to get over it, I know.

7 comments:

  1. Nanette, I've always thought of you as a runner, you run halfs, you have a lot of good advice about health and running...couldn't have thought of you otherwise!

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  2. Aw shucks :) I know its a mental change for me to make...I'll get there. Maybe I need to hit that 1-year milestone? Hey, it will be here before you know it!

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    1. This is precisely why I think you're so awesome and MUST be a runner. You are dedicated/committed to running...me, not so much. I'm training for a 10k but like I said, you're already running halfs. And not even at your 1 year anniversary! Awesomeness. :)

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    2. Awesome....I'm blushing :)

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  3. You are totally a runner! If you love to run (most days) then in my mind, that is all it takes. A few years ago when I started running, I got a subscription to Runner's World, and he thought it was funny since I wasn't a "runner". Well - I may not be an elite runner, but I have proven him wrong hundreds of times over, everytime I slide on my sneakers and step out the front door. I love to run, therefore, I am a runner :)

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    1. oops - that "he" I am referring to is my non-running husband!

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  4. Mama, you are too funny. I got the oval car magnet, and didn't put it on my car for several weeks! I enjoy the challenge, so I don't plan on stopping....and maybe once I reach my one year anniversary, I'll be there...mentally, that is.

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